After a series of really challenging personal and professional events I started journaling life lessons as notes to myself in my mid 30's . They are "Things I wish I Knew When I Was 22", one for each year of my life:
  • The only thing I control is me; my thoughts, words, actions & choices. Control beyond that is an illusion. No one is responsible for me, I am responsible for myself.
  • A healthy spirit needs a healthy mind & healthy mind needs a healthy body. Don't neglect yourself - exercise and being still are as important as "doing".
  • Birds of a feather flock together. Choose friends wisely they impact our lives & attitudes, represent our values & priorities.
  • Attitude is everything. It is the fine line between bad behavior & bad character.
  • Feelings are important but emotions should never be relied on for important decisions; they are dynamic & often not based on reality but perception.
  • The little things add up to the big things - never underestimate this with people or work and try not to confuse the two, they are not the same.
  • The key to happiness is finding peace with yourself & loving who you are. Then you can love others for who they are not who you want them to be.
  • "To act from Desire & Fear is bondage; to act from Love is freedom." S.N. Maharaj
  • We teach others how to love & treat us by how we do this to ourselves.
  • Family are those who you love and those who love you no matter what - a friend is someone you never have to worry about thinking out loud around. Both take you with and through the good and the bad.
  • See the world to know the world and its people, it's hard to truly appreciate what you haven't experienced first hand.
  • If you are unwilling to forgive, you don’t know love. We all need both.
  • A relationship means two people are mutually invested, everything else is a "situation".
  • Feeling good does not mean you are healthy. Feeling bad does not always mean you have a problem, it can just mean something is wrong.
  • Change is painful but rewarding.
  • If you are doing your best and someone can or will walk out of your life, let them. If you aren't doing your best, do it, it's the best way to fight for what you believe in.
  • Believing doesn’t make it real, just real to you.
  • It is what it is, don’t take it personal.
  • Actions speak louder than words, but hurtful words can be more damaging to heart and soul than blows to the body.
  • Less is more.
  • What we think we become, who we spend our time with effects our thoughts as does what we digest in life.
  • Just because it’s a “fact” doesn't make it true.
  • If you put yourself in a compromising situation, you will make compromising decisions.
  • Don’t ignore your gut feeling. Slow down, when it tells you something isn’t right use your head, if you don’t you may miss your chance to fix what's wrong.
  • Following the 10 Commandments will never limit you; ignorance, greed (selfishness) and fear are our true limitations. Some restrictions are not truly limits.
  • Limits are the boundaries established to secure personal happiness & freedom, they are necessary for health, wellness and happiness.
  • We are mirrors to people & often when they reject us it means they are just unwilling to face themselves or they simply don’t care. Don’t personalize.
  • Sex is never "just sex". You always take something away & leave something behind.
  • Money equals more choices, not happiness. More choices equal more personal freedom, but you can be a slave to that too.
  • True sacrifice is selfless. Giving up something for potential future benefit or gain is an opportunity cost, not a sacrifice.
  • Love is not an emotion, it is a gift, it is a commitment & "Happiness is not having what you want, it's wanting what you have."
  • You can never demand respect, it is only earned. Be quick to hear, slow to speak and slow to anger.
  • Good company, music and a little wine lead to a light heart and laughter. Laughter is the best medicine & gratitude is the root of love, both enrich everything. But everything in moderation.
  • True love is not conditional. If there is an agenda it is not love its desire. A healthy relationship always has conditions.
  • Rapport does not equal relationship.
  • Practice makes perfect. Life is not waiting for the storm to pass, its learning to dance in the rain.
  • It is not the job that brings dignity to the person but the person who brings dignity to the job. Failure is what you make of it, and often that is the key to success.
  • Finding the right mentor can do more for your life and career than finding the right job.
  • When mom said you are what you eat, she wasn’t exaggerating.
  • The moment is the greatest gift you have, learn everything you can from it - it's all you really have.
  • We live when we give.
#IfIWere22